Tea, Dives & Zombie Attacks…Doug does Scotland

Dear Journal,

It’s me again, Doug, and you’ll never guess where my adventures have taken me next! I am up in Boonie Scotland! It all started with a mysterious phone call..

You see when the Queen calls you it doesn’t just come up on your caller ID as “The Queen”. Instead it is a very round about and complicated procedure involving lots of personal questions to verify your identity before she actually gets on the phone. Do you think she has to go through all of that just to call up Prince Charles? Anyway, I was on the train heading north from London when my phone rang. It seems her majesty is up at her summer home in Scotland and was wondering if I would like to stop by for tea. Having no previous plans I figure why not (as if I would have actually turned down the Queen!). So I ended up at the Palace at Holyrood sitting in the gardens with old Lizzie herself. It was quite an exquisite place! We then joined a procession up the Royal Mile and were treated to a tour of the Edinburgh Castle!

I stayed up on Castle Hill and that night, on Her Royal Majesty’s recommendation, I took in the Royal Edinburgh Military Tattoo. Their performances count as one of the 4 events that make up Edinburgh Festival. I didn’t realize this was such a big thing, but they set up a giant grandstand right in front of the castle and over 200,000 people come to see them during this one week!

The show was awesome, featuring marching and music, a lone bagpiper on the castle walls and a firework show at the end!

Inverness seemed like the place to go next. I’ve always wanted to see the Scottish Highlands and the famous Loch Ness. One of the main sites of the area, other than the Loch itself, is the Urquhart Castle ruins. They were a neat place to explore! While perched on a crumbling old wall having a rest something in the water caught me eye. It could have been a wave. It could have been a duck. It could have been nothing at all! But there was this overwhelming suspicion building in my gut that it had been so much more!

I hired a boat to take me to the deepest part of the lake but soon discovered that sitting on the surface would get me nowhere. It was surprisingly easy to find a dive suit in the Loch Ness area…building one my size doesn’t take much material. Once back on the water with my air hose hooked up I plunged into the deep on a quest for answers. Periodically is sent out sonar waves, watching for any irregularities. And boy did I start to get some big ones! A little more exploring revealed a cave. And in that cave…Nessie! Imagine, the Loch Ness Monster hiding out in a cave for all these years! Much to my surprise I seem to be able to speak Monster. Nessie told me how she likes the life of mystery but allows glimpses of herself because she likes the attention. It can get kind of lonely in the bottom of the largest lake in the UK! I told her I have a friend back home names Plesio and I thought they’d get along well. She liked the sound of that and I think I will bring him along on my next visit.

(That was Plesio last summer when we visited Jurassic Forest.)

I thought I’d round out my visit with a trip to Glasgow. Now Glasgow’s sites are a bit more wide spread than some of the other cities I’ve been to so I decided to use one of the Sightseeing Tour Buses as a means to get around. One of the stops of the tour had to be moved because George Square, right in the center of town, was closed. Apparently there is a movie being filmed there! I found myself thinking “Wouldn’t it be cool to see a real movie being filmed!” so I hopped off my Hop On/Hop Off bus and headed into the square.

Now the next part was kind of a blur but almost as soon as I reached the barricade holding the fans back from a crazy warlike wreckage of cars someone was over telling me I was perfect. Perfect for what? I barely had time to register that I was to replace a sick extra before I was rushed through hair and makeup and wardrobe and thrust onto a real live set! They told me to act like zombies were attacking…so I went a little bizzurck. I worried it had been a little overdramatic but Brad didn’t think so. Who is Brad you might ask? No not Brad Kummer but Brad Pitt! The heartthrob himself! He complimented my work and gave me a few pointers to use in future scenes. The moral of the story? Look for me in World War Z!

Well that’s all from Scotland. Until next time, here’s a hint of where I’m going next:

Keep Smiling,
Doug